Dowry Speculations....

As I was having lunch with a colleaugue who is also a good friend... we were discussing his impending marriage... he was very happy and it seemed it was not because he would be getting a girl to spend his life with. His whole future will be taken care of by the dowry that he will be getting... when asked how much he would be getting .. he shyly says ... they are giving me 30 lakhs.. cash GAWK... I was like... DOUBLE GAWK...

Ok and he is a guy who is just starting off his career and typically getting married early.. but just thinking back in perspective as to how much they are willing to give their daughters away with... he shyly said to me that his family gave 20 lakhs for his sister ... so his family's account will be kind of balanced... Smart Aye ?? Then he went on ... Oh you know the other pal got some 50 lakhs.. 30 lakhs is nothing yaar..( NOTHING.. How can he say NOTHING !!!) .. that is what fades from my thoughts ... and I was wondering in my mind... what I would do with that kind of immediate money... Travel the world... Open a company of my own.. Buy a Bose Home theatre.. Buy a land and make my dream house... Have a kennel of dogs... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz...... Suddenly I am rocked with the hot !#$&&!!# pizza burning my palatte and am rudely awakened from my ruminations... serves me right for building castles with somebody else's money .. LOLOLOL Anyways... I was thinking it would be so easy to spend all that dough... and I am reminded every now and then ... how good I am at emptying my bank balance... SIGH... Back to my world of savings... spendings.. savings.. spendings... = zilch... as I call myself... pound wise pound foolish... I cant help think back to my wedding where my dad spent an indecent amount of money and bought all things necessary for my inlaws house. ( which is rotting with disuse) .. instead of giving them to me ( yeah right as if I had any say)... I still cannot understand why he had to spend so much.. when the money did not come to anybody's use... and he says... it was all for me... I do not see a ME anywhere there.. go figure... cant help wondering what a waste all that money went to... and for what.... something in the disguise of something disgusting called providing for the daughter so that the people who know you will nod with approval of giving away your only daughter with so much useless pomp and show... SIGH ... Then again my friend's dad was very smart... I call this intelligence..he gave her the cash all that was necessary and made her save it in her account.. with the help of which she has built a pretty nest for herself.. which is reasonably good use of the money... My point is... well at first there is no great need to exchange all that money.. but if one is doing so.. one has to invest it wisely .. instead of bothering about what people would say.. but I guess the society functions like that so I have reached a moot point.. Ladies, if you are getting married make sure you wisely deal with your Stree Dhan... and build a better future over what has been given to you... Am I sounding wierd ? well I guess it is the influence of the lunch discussion and a very bad cold that I am laden with... which is not making me think straight...

Living and not just existing

Just when you thought that well things have settled down enough for a hot cup of tea.. in comes another challenge.. this seems to be the month for challenges... that again enhances the fact that I have to live and not just exist. Work wise ... the "peering eyes" are acting up again for no damn reason. I have this one "peering eye" whose communication skills are lacking to the zilch.. either he does not understand english or has a very short memory... either way... I hope the Almighty blesses him with both qualities in due course of time.. Got a pack of Faery card pack to work with. This helps in working with the elementals of the elements and the elements themsleves. It has always been my desire to understand the elements better.. When it comes to cards, the media has made a joke out of it. In the channel Zoom they have this lady going dramatically about life's problems and how this tarot lady solves it.. Seems so much like a farce. ... and the sad thing is that people are lapping it up.. Living alone is pretty ok even if I am missing my man.. but it is doing good to talk to myself and reflect on what needs to be done... with myself.. as in look ahead.. but not as in going loony :) new year is dawning on us.. I was thinking to myself that I was never one to make a resolution .. or a promise.. coz i never kept them... i would prefer to look at it as commitment to some goal and go forward... has a long term meaning to it which works fine for me... Tomorrow I am having visitors from the eastern part of the country which will gladden my heart.. yes I am looking forward to meeting them... Watched Rakht.... do not think it is worth a review. Brrrr !!! Just when I was stopped thinking about the earthquake possibilities in Assam, my mom calls and tells me that there was a bomb blast in the city very near our home.. this again stresses the fact how unpredictable our comfortable existence might be.. and this occured just some kms away from where we live in Beltola. I think Shillong was a much better place even with all the insurgencies... dont know.. never could identify with Guahati..

Two killed in city blastBy A Staff Reporter GUWAHATI, Dec 13: Two constables were killed and three persons were injured in a bomb explosion in front of the Hatigaon police outpost this evening. The explosives, suspected to be a bomb, were hidden inside an abandoned scooter. The dead have been identified as Pranab Bhatta, constable and Akbar Ali, home guard. The injured have been admitted to the GMCH. The incident occurred around 7-15 pm after some police personnel of the Hatigaon outpost brought the scooter that had been left abandoned near a pharmacy, towards the outpost. After some time the blast occurred, killing the duo on the spot. Police said the exact nature of the explosives was yet to be ascertained. The hand behind the blast was also being examined, police said. The whole area was immediately cordoned off and senior police officials rushed to the spot. Meanwhile, the AASU has condemned the blast, saying the Government has totally failed to maintain law and order even in the State capital. Read more

Monday Mumbles

Here comes another Monday again.. Just when I thought that I would cozy up in a corner on the weekend with movies like Before Sunset, etc., I promptly get an insistent invitation from friends who kindly decided not to leave me on my own ... for whatever puposes.. sometimes its difficult convincing friends that one likes to be on one's own sometimes... but all said and done it was fun... . Point of concern Assam has had a red alert issued by the government my folks toldme the other day. There are major possibilities of an earthquake.. lot of people were awake from 3:00 to 6:00 am in the morning.. day before . Shillong has been experiencing quakes everyday.. earthquakes in Shillong is very common that way.. but hopefully nothing major is about to happen.. people in the east are however expecting a big one like the one which happened 50 years back. If this is true then people out there need to be more aware....

Planets forecast earthquake in Assam: GeologistDecember 04, 2004 19:40 IST Planetary configurations suggest the possibility of an earthquake measuring up to five or six in the Richter scale in Assam on December 12, a Madras University geologist told an international conference on natural hazards in Hyderabad on Saturday. N Venkatanathan said a theory developed by his group indicates that the epicentre of the quake, which may occur around 0600 IST, would be 26.91 degrees north latitude and 94.49 east longitude with an error of one degree -- about 100 km west-southwest of Dibrugarh. More news reports.... Read more

One for the day !! My friend U planning to take me out for lunch.. on friday.. she insists that she wants to take me out.. I politely try to refuse but nothing doing... she is a dear friend so what the heck !! Now U is a very patient sort totally opposite to yours truly.. but when she is driving,... she kind of loses it and becomes a different personality altogether.. you can hear all teh cuss words in the dictionary which kinda makes me go GAWK... ( thinking to myself ... I think I am more tolerant on the road) we decide to meet next to Hotel Chandrika from where she will pick me up. U comes and sees some police there and is forced to move down the road... U calls me : Pallavi, I am on Cunningham Road. Where do I meet you ? I could not stop in the planned point so tell me where to meet you. Me: (Thinking fast) meet me where you parked last.. when you came to meet me.. U: Okay.... and she switches off.. I start walking down the road ... where I ask her to come ... on walking quite a distance.. i see no sign of her... I call her up on her cell and ask her... where she is ? U: okay Pallavi I am in Cunnigham road but I do not know where.. its in the beginning of the road.. and I see some bank and some office in front of me.... . Me: (Flabbergasted) but you told me that you will be meeting me here... where you parked the last time... ( my temper slowly boiling.. at having to walk quite a distance for nuts). U: well I thought this would be easier.. so come and meet me here.... wherever I am . Me: ( finding it irritating and slowly losing my fast draining patience) now how do I know where you are.. cunnigham road has lot of beginnings and lots of banks and offices.. ( I had lost my appetite by now). U: With a suffering SIGH ( as if it was my fault) ok I shall come and pick you up at your office.. Me: I say OK ... feeling really not upto going anywhere.. walked 20 minutes back to square 1 and then find her ... Question : how can one confuse oneself so ? and well how does one find someone.. if that someone gives direction as SOME office and SOME bank.. Suffice it to say that I shall be very careful the next time I go for lunch with U.. SIGH !!! . and as if it is not enough.. she puts me on edge when I am with her.. sitting next to her in the car... the moment someone honks... she is ready to get out of her car and beat the hell out of that person... SIGH !! . Moral of the story : Stay away from fussy and cussy friends... if you are not in control of the situation.. LOL .

Anniversary thoughts

Tomorrow we will be completing 4 years of togetherness.. As I was sitting all by myself, I was wondering how fast these years flew by. It was just as if it was yesterday that I got a mail from a stranger wanting to be friends and though internet was very new it was by fluke that we started writing to each other.. him from bombay and myself from bangalore... Going through painful blocks of life's ironical poetry.. I always had this clinging faith that there bloody well be someone for me who would be just right for me and walk with me. I was very well prepared to walk it out by myself if there was going to be another situation of compromise... Lo and behold.!! .. the magic of togetherness just dropped into my life.. and it seemed that this was the case with Rocks too.. a wild man but with just the right touch of crazy humor and seriousness... just what I needed to balance my whacky personality... Of course when I saw the snap which he mailed me... coz according to my little experience.. brains and brawns did not go together.... and I was not impressed with a leather sporting.. bike riding... having his share of looks.. dude... I was already charting him as another number in my very little black book of friends.. and acquaintances... But fate or lets say the fervent prayer of a soulmate... connecting to another had other plans... a narrow escape... an almost life consuming accident... communicating over the phone while Rocks was on crutches... accepting the fact that yes we definitely had the chemistry which would forge the invisible bond of love and understanding...the fact that our oats that we had sown... however wild that might have been... had borne the same fruits of pain and anguish.. the result of which made us recognise a good thing when it was staring at our face... willing us to take another final chance... .all of that had us going forward .... to create the circle of life in Barua's lane .... riding high riding low... but riding no matter what... on the highway of life...

My lessons... Life can be tough .. but one should focus on one's dream even if it is silly enough as having a pair of black pumps without bows, strings, buckles... Relationships are not easy but that does not mean that one should give up on them... and when a good chance comes along.. one should take it up with confidence... rather than live in a hell of obscureness.. thinking that it was all your damn fault. A bad relationship does not mean that you need to hang on just for the sake of it .. or for the reason ... like ... "what will people say..??" I had this feeling for sometime when I was in the circle of bitterness and bad karmic ties which had me going round and round in cirlces not knowing what to do .... Break ups are another way of fate telling you that YOU both deserve better... Reflecting too much in the past does not help.. since what is past is past.. if you keep living in the past ... the present will pass you by and the future will be without substance,... what did not work ... cannot work after whatever many years.... If you have broken up ... there is a good reason that you did and there is not use beating yourself to death about this... specially when the past comes and stares at your face and has the gall to remind you that insipte of all the pain that the soul has caused and inspite of having a mate... he would be proclaiming his love for you anyway.. DUH and you were going out with such a wimp... Past boyfriends can never be friends... no matter what the books say.... stay away from old flames... they tend to burn more brightly... LOL... and make sure that your guy also does that.. you got to have alarm bells ringing when he introduces you to his ex-flame.. who still makes his eyes misty... LOL Your past is your past and you must be careful about washing your dirty linen in front of your present, who really has no interest in that.. except for the fact that it would give that person a chance to emotionally hassle you... if your beau is the possessive and destructive kinds... ( BRRR) Never take abuse in a relationship.. emotional and physical.. it is corroding to the relationship ( ??) and to your personal growth... Love and lust are two different things... :) good to combine.. deadly if you do not know the difference.. Marriage and dating are two poles apart... and a different ball game together ... which should be enjoyed as per the rules of the concerned game... dating rules dont apply in marriage and vice versa...

SIGH and today I am remembering my man a lot... four years ... and honey heres to us ... hoping to make many memories... so far yet so near... Filled me with joy: Meeting a Fat Persian cat called Leo with whom I am totally and madly fallen in love.. reminds me of my Mini in Shillong... GRRRR : Two bikers riding parellely discussing life's philosophy... for quite a distance... thus making me late... why can't they find a coffee place to discuss whatevers bothering them ...

Another Italian Bite .... I think this is the Italian season for me..Today I discovered another place called Ambara... it was well known to people in Indiranagar. Now this little cafe cum boutique has shifted base in Ulsoor.. near Ulsoor Lake. Read More...

Some salt some pepper

Thats how my life is right now.. Just when I was thinking of having a chilled out weekend with Bangalore Habba happening life decides to put me in a rocking boat... and suffice it to say that I am going through a crisis which I am praying that my family will be out of very soon.. someone is not well at home.. and hoping for early recovery of that dear soul... Got to know that the senior management at work is really sensitive to the employee's situation when it was required and I am very grateful for their support. when times are tough only a strong will prevails and I believe in hanging on till it becomes impossible.. and I do not believe in throwing in the towel.. Ah ha apart from that ... I went to watch the play Zen Katha and it was a beautiful play which really made me feel good after watching it...

A beautiful play directed by Lillete Dubey, this expounds on the story of a prince who becomes the first partriarch who spreads the ideology of Zen and Buddhism in China. Casting included Rajiv Gopalkrishna, Sandhya Mridal, Denzil Smith, Vikram Chaturvedi, Asif Ali Beg, Shardul Chaturvedi, Anu Menon, Pawan Singh, Pallavi Symons. (By the way the photographs that you see here have been all clicked by me) Read More...

Watched Vanity Fair. That was a good movie.. I liked it but you might find it a bit slow..

A good adaption of the novel by William Makepeace Thackeray this is the story of a woman who is orphaned and does not give up any chance to make a good life for herself.

Casting Jim Broadbent, Gabriel Byrne, Bob Hoskins, Geraldine McEwan, Ruth Sheen, Reese Witherspoon, James Purefoy, Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Rhys Ifans, Romola Garai, Lilette Dubey..etc Read more...

Finally got to have in one of the cutest place Herb and Spice run by a cute guy ( yes I noticed that) . Where I had Rahul Dravid wth his wife sitting bext to my dinner table. Of course... I pretended that I did not know him... LOLOL.( snooty me !! ) . and looked the other way and was interesting to see the reaction of the other people in the restaurant... some got fidegity and some had big rolling eyes.. the guys had an envious looks... the kids were excited.. I on the other hand sighed and finished my dinner .. LOLOL...

Yes I dared to go Italian inspite of my drab experience in Little Italy.. this Sunday when I was on my way back from work. I was told about this place by Aqua who had great raves about it .Now do not go and mistake Herb And Spice with Herbs and Spices. The former is the only one of its kind and the latter has its branches all over Bangalore. Read More..

The week is otherwise whizzing by without me having the time to do much... Trying to finish a very interesting book on Siberian Shamanism.. which is another unique technique to look at life and living.. Had a bad morning.. too .. got to pass by two mutilated dead bodies of accident victims on Old Madras road and I cannot just seem to get rid of that horrific scene. Heaven help those souls ... and give me the strength to erase that picture from my mind... it was awful.. and this is the first time I came across such a tragic scene... life and death come hand in hand but sometimes the violene of it just shakes the core of the soul... On a lighter note... the lady in the office who might have read the office humor post seems to have improved on the toilets... she is a nice soul but sometimes like that day she kind of takes my good breath away... LOLOL .. god bless her.. Wierd happenings Somebody has finished my packet of chocolates that I keep to munch in my office drawer... BAWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL !!! WAAHHHHH !!! Just the other day it was full and today I see an empty packet... no ...that KIND person has left one for me in the packet..... LOLOLOL ... SIGH my fault for forgetting to lock the drawer .. some days !!! Warm Welcome To a dear friend who has started blogging. Do visit this page when you can. Yo Anumita... way to go !!! Finally you blogged.... sorry I realised it a bit late !! :)